Month: March 2017

Emotional intelligence in the ability to understand and control your own emotions and understand and perceive the emotions of others.  Many companies are looking for certain characteristics associated with emotional intelligence, or EI, during the hiring process, as  it is believed to present a competitive advantage over individuals that do not possess these qualities.  The question remains, then, can someone increase his or her emotional intelligence?

The simple answer is yes.  But that is not to say it will be an easy task.  On the surface, you might think that understanding your own emotions is easy or that you are already really good at it.  But think about the last time you were so angry you yelled at someone else – a boyfriend or girlfriend maybe?  Your child?   A parent?  Did you feel as though you were pushed and could not control that anger?  Did you feel bad after the fact about how you reacted?   That is an example of a situation in which you can increase your emotional intelligence, and also an example of just how difficult the process can be.

The best place to start is with yourself.  Once you have a good understanding of yourself, your own emotions, and then you can begin to learn to control those emotions.  It will take great mental effort to catch the moments that present areas of opportunity.  A good starting point is to have a time of reflection.  Keep a journal handy, and when you react poorly or negatively, take a few minutes to reflect on the situation.  Write down the trigger that caused you to be upset or emotional, and go one step deeper.  Was is the situation, or was there something underlying that led to this reaction?  What exactly did you feel at the time?  Was it anger, frustration, empathy, sympathy, embarrassment, fatigue, hurt, sorrow, sadness?   What emotional tie exists between your feelings and the situation?  WHY did you get so upset?

The more specific you can get with how you felt, why you felt that way, and if there is a deeper influence, the easier it will be start recognizing the triggers.  Eventually, you will recognize the trigger before the reaction, and the real changing can begin.

There is nothing I dread more than that first prospecting call of the day.  If you are in sales of any kind, you know what I’m talking about….that moment when you have procrastinated as long as possible sending emails, researching your prospects, making one more cup of coffee, and now the only thing left to do is pick up that phone and dial that first number.  I know I’m not alone in this feeling.

Last week I sat in my office for 8 hours for a phone block day.  It had been a while since the last time I dedicated a large chunk of time with the ultimate goal of setting appointments.  Boy, was it an eye opening experience!!  I sent my boss a recap of the activity for the day, and I was honest about my disappointment in my progress and my skills.  Surprisingly, I didn’t do as well as I had hoped.  And to top it off, I noticed myself getting increasingly depressed and discouraged as the day went on.  Where I started at 25 calls in my first hour, I ended in hour 5 with only 9 or 10.  Definitely a defeating day.

Needless to say, I knew there was room for improvement.  So I went home, opened up a book about objectives, listened to a podcast about cold calling and prospecting, listed out what I was going to different this week, and created a plan of action.  My prospecting list is  planned and laid out, with more numbers and contact names than before.  My time is set.  I plan on doing some personal development and refreshers in the morning prior to my phone block in order to get in to the right mindset and attitude.  Most importantly, I will have a goal to make friends.  It’s all about being able to find a connection quickly but also genuinely.

I am still dreading the first call this morning.  I may always dread the first call of the day.  I will probably find emails to send, research to do, and make a coffee run before I pick up the phon.  But today, I have a plan to follow and feel that I am more prepared.  I know it’s going to be a good prospecting day.  My attitude is the start of something wonderful.  And before I end my call block from here on out, I’m going to make just one more call.  I’ll let you know how goes.  Wish me luck!

In sales, we always feel like we should be closing the next big deal.  But today, I urge you to be curious.  Ask lots of questions and dig deep to make a connection with your customer.  Make them your friend first. You would be amazed at the difference your pipeline will see simply by changing your mindset from “setting an appointment” to “making a friend”.  How many friends can you make today?

People who are extremely likable often score high in Emotional Intelligence qualities, or EQ.  They also tend to demonstrate EQ traits in all areas of their daily life.  In sales, this is a huge factor in your success rate.  Research has shown that people buy from people they like and who are like them.  So when a prospective customer says no, you SHOULD take it personal, at least on some level.

Tim Sanders breaks likeability into four categories: Friendliness, relevance, empathy, and realness (more on this here ).  Being friendly and open to the possibilities that exist, being relevant to the present conversation or situation, having empathy and showing true care and concern, and being real and genuine to who you are as a person will increase your likeability.  And an increase in your likeability will increase your success rate by a minimum of 12%.

That’s right!  People are 12% more likely to buy from someone they like, 25% more likely to buy from someone they consider a friend, and more than 70% would take the recommendation of a friend or family member over another option.

So as you go into your next meeting or you make that next prospecting call, go in there with the mindset to make a new friend.  And don’t forget about your current customers.  Be friends, and get the referrals you need to grow your business.